i think the new banner's rather crappy lol. gimp 2.6 is sort of a pain in the ass to use, cos of its single window interface. but nvm, as with all things, 习惯就好. many things that upset me, many things that i hate, just keep happening, that after a while you just get used to it. and resigned to it. didn't they say all things happen for a reason? (yes they did.)

wednesday managed to sneak into aj to play tennis. shhh i sneaked in so technically im not supposed to say. it was fun, although i got owned by zm like totally. lol. 习惯就好. then i think i caught a cold cos played in the rain for awhile. but fun.

thursday was tuition. was dreading to go, as usual. turns out we did miss out on quite a bit two weeks ago. what the hell's a silver mirror, anyway. lol. anyway after tuition xy accompanied me to collect my eee pc (not mine from tomorrow) and look at tennis racquets. in the end i bought a head ti.impulse. i thought it looked like it was worth 100 bucks+, but i paid only 45. lol.

friday was hiong tennis. haha. 2-4 at yck. got owned again. hahah. 0-6 5-7 1-6. never won my serve. but i did an ace. hahahah. or so i think i did. the racquet feels quite okay though, although it doesn't have that feeling when you serve. then went to city hall to get grips! and then we went to the cc at tpy to play for another 2 hours again. lol and i won only like 4-5 games.

the new grip's not bad, i guess, at least for my taste. but somehow a little part of it is torn, i dunno why. the dampener needs some getting used to i guess.

so what if it's a 45 buck racquet. afterall, its the player, not the racquet that matters, right? right? (self delusion again) i mean even andy roddick beat someone with a frying pan.

well, as for today, it was tuition as per normal. but i did pay slightly more attn than usual. haha. couple of new faces too, i guess. then i went to sitex alone. guess no one wants to travel so far, so didn't really bother asking. took a super longgg bus ride to pasir ris, then switched trains. speaking of pasir ris, i've never been to the mrt station or interchange in my life. and my memories of white sands is rather vague. i remember it had a timezone though. did it?

reaching expo, it seems that there's no such thing as a recession huh. it feels weird, maybe half good half bad, to be invisible, lost in the crowd. there's one way to avoid getting flyers--just look up ahead, at the balloons and stuff. but then eh, it sucks to be alone sometimes too. lol. but then, 习惯就好.

in the end, i didn't buy anything there. nothing enticing enough.

went home and discovered that my phone is creaking even more than normal. i wonder how long this thing will last, huh. i've already taken super good care of it. lol. maybe it doesn't deserve that treatment. i hate the sounds of creaking. but then again, 习惯就好.

hopefully i can get my core2duo tomorrow lolol.

reuben
@ 1:30 AM.

lol some parts of my 6210 are starting to creak alr, maybe thats what you get when you use a cheap nokia phone huh.

anyway today's an atypical tuesday i guess.

reuben
@ 11:25 PM.

just has the carefree feeling to it.

oh and btw, youtube's widescreen now.

reuben
@ 12:39 PM.

the result of having a fun-packed weekend is that by the time tuesday arrives, you'll start feeling empty.

which is what i'm feeling now i guess.

on friday played basketball at bishan for about two hours. well if not for the blister on my feet maybe i could've played better i guess. but then again i'm still a noob at bball. heh. but it's been a long time since we played bball together. we got owned almost totally by the outside teams, but i guess, it's the fun that counts.

also the match on saturday was cancelled. which was good, because i was tired out on friday night. so that means, i could sleep in the entire saturday morning.

well, in the end, i didn't go out until the evening, where i met a buyer to sell my mio modem. then i realised my phone's memory card was screwed, so i went home to get my ipod, and then went to city hall to meet grace zm and wenqian. charles was supposed to come but then he overslept.

went to sakae buffet at marina square. we ate like 20+ plates in total i think, and we finished up all the rice. ahem.

then watched body of lies. i think the storyline is very deep and maybe intriguing, but then again i don't really like movies with such a deep plot. so yeah in the end i was wondering wtf did i watch.

by the time the movie ended it was already almost 2am. so we were essentially stuck at marina sq. just like last year after grad night. i was enlightened that there was a toilet on the 2nd floor that was accessible from outside, well, if i knew that a year ago, maybe i wouldn't be in such an agony that time lol.

we stoned at mcdonalds after that to catch some sleep, then catch the first train later. but after awhile i couldn't really take it, so i cabbed home.

cos afterall the next day i had to leave hse at 8.30!

yeah so sunday went to sentosa with the 4-1 peeps. too many ppl to list here, heh. many people i've not seen in months.

i realise i've not been to sentosa for more than a year. actually, i don't think much has changed, except maybe the IR that's under construction now.

played beach volleyball basketball and of course, everyone went into the water, either by choice or by force. heheh.

don't have any pictures offhand, cos i didnt bring a camera along.

but on hidnsight maybe we wasted our 3 bucks on the sentosa ticket. cos we didn't really do anything else there!

after that all of us went to plaza sing to have lunch. ate chicken chop rice or something. was surprisingly affordable.

then went to prinsep street to play lan. i rmb being there like almost 2 years ago, for the xfire bf2 special forces tournament. lots of things changed since. the CRTs all replaced by LCDs, new chairs, new razer mice. but if i'm not wrong the everglide keyboards were still the same. oh, the happy times. how three years have flew by. anyway we played 5v5 dota and my KD was 11-9 or something. woohoo. haha

after lan it was like almost 7 alr! so we headed to zm's hse. dapao'ed prata and did weird things outside the prata hse. charles got drunk after 1 can of Heineken. weak =x.

played top spin against eugene at zm's hse. lol won him 3-2 or something. then lost to lionel, and evened out with zh. i love the topspin 134mph service ace!

and then played risk with lionel and albert. in the end i got killed first again, in part due to albert and i fighting over south america. rofl. maybe i should've gone for asia instead eh. i never seem to win at strategy games =\ or rather anything for that matter.

then the following day i was supposed to go for trg. but overslept and wasn't really feeling well, so yeah. in the afternoon though, we played poker and mahjong. for once i wasn't the biggest loser! haha.

oh well. three days and seventy bucks have past. now it's back to reality.

i realise there's nth much to look forward to. trainings and tuitions. sigh. but then its good as well, cos it distracts you from things you're worried about, at least for a moment.

talking about worries, i think maybe certain things are related to karma eh. heh.

and everything seems to come around one cycle. i'm at the start of the cycle once again. for the umpteenth time.

read the blogs of some of the sec4 peeps who just finished their Os. it seems i'm not really alone in feeling that emptiness. i rmb last year after Os after all the euphoria ended it was just pure boredom.

but maybe it'd be good to go back to those times again. i have lots of things weighing down on me, i hate life as it is right now. tuitions gonna start this sunday, damn, reality has sunk in finally. my pathetic results which i have to work on next year or no going to uni for me. december's arriving. wow. time to pick up my books again. sigh.


i really hope we'll get to go out again huh. it sucks how these outings are once in a blue moon.

reuben
@ 11:48 AM.

too bad this is just a 'bonus track', if not it would definitely be rihanna's best song ever.

I'm not the type to get my heart broken
I'm not the type to get upset and cry
'cause I never leave my heart open
Never hurts me to say goodbye
Relationships don't get deep to me
Never got the whole in love thing
And someone can say they love me truly
But at the time it didn't mean a thing

[Chorus:]
My mind is gone, I'm spinning round
And deep inside, my tears I'll drown
I'm losing grip, what's happening
I stray from love, this is how I feel
This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm, in this condition
And I've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

Did it happen when we first kissed?
'cause it's hurting me to let it go
Maybe 'cause we spent so much time
And I know that it's no more
I should've never let you hold me baby
Maybe why I'm sad to see us apart
I didn't give to you on purpose
Can't figure out how you stole my heart

[Chorus]

How did I get here with you, I'll never know?
I never meant to let it get so, personal
After all I tried to do, stay away from loving you
I'm broken hearted, I can't let you know
And I won't let it show
You won't see me cry

[x2]
This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm, in this condition
And I've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

All my life...

reuben
@ 11:46 AM.

got my navigator phone on saturday as well. pretty cool actually, the gps function that is.

i guess over the past week life has been mundane for the most part. but well, it could only get better, i guess, this saturday and sunday. can't wait for the 4-1 class outing on sunday!

in the mean time however, it seems to be all about waiting, waiting and waiting.

whoever said patience is a virtue was a liar. or maybe s/he didn't intend it to mean this way. but we shouldn't wait for things to happen. you'll be at the mercy of somebody else. you'll be under control.

instead, we should do what needs to be done; do what you wanna do. life's short, i guess. it's like breaking serve in tennis, you want to change things so that you're in control, and not the other way round. not waiting for yourself to get aced, but to hit a return ace.

on tues had a longgg chat with an old friend. okay not that old. heh. but it does seem weird when we realise that we talked about practically anything under the sun once upon a time not too long ago, and that we've drifted away since.

and so thats how many of us have drifted away. but somehow when i look at the messages i saved in december (yes sometimes i do keep messages), i seem to be messaging almost the exact same people at this moment. maybe life has come a full circle again. but then there are changes too. maybe the same people i've been messaging last year are no longer the same people this year.

over the past year, i guess, some of us have not been that close anymore. maybe cos its of all the bgrs, or new friends they've made in jc or poly or whatever. indeed sometimes you whine about how other people have come in and taken them away, but c'est la vie! it's their life, anyway. but it's good of course, to keep in touch every now and then.

and then those who were in your inbox last year and are somehow still in there now, i guess you could consider them your true friends.

in the last post i mentioned that i don't really have any true friends. but i guess, since that post, i've actually found a few. maybe. just maybe.

went gyming yesterday, alone, the first time in god knows when. clocked 11.38 for 2.4 on the treadmill. tried doing the arms thingy at 64kg, managed to do one. did the other four at 59kg. weight's dropped again, to 71.5kg. a little more to go, i guess.

and no trip to the cc would be complete without going to the rooftop. yesterday was a gloomy day, like it was gonna rain but it didn't want to.



where's the silver lining?

and although its the holidays now and i'm freer than anything i could ever be, but deep inside



i feel trapped.



anyway to those who have opened a listening ear, thank you. the general consensus seems to be, just hold on.



but eh, this song seems to be the perfect song for now.

天空灰的像哭過
離開你以後並沒有更自由
酸酸的空氣
嗅出我們的距離
一幕椎心的結局
像呼吸般無法停息

抽屜泛黃的日記
榨乾了回憶
那笑容是夏季
你我的過去
被順時針的忘記
缺氧過後的愛情
粗心的眼淚是多餘

我知道你我都沒有錯
只是忘了怎麼退後
信誓旦旦給了承諾
卻被時間撲了空

我知道我們都沒有錯
只是放手會比較好過
最美的愛情回憶裡待續

reuben
@ 11:41 AM.

不要叫我比赛 不要再看我成绩单
不要再无奈 不要再忍耐 不要再让我伤肝
天天都火腿蛋 天天都排骨鸡腿饭
我需要扭转 我需要意外 我需要感觉存在

当阳光很冷淡 心情很吉普赛
没人能挡住我 跟平凡掰掰
方向盘指向南 一路都不转弯
除非我看到沙滩 看到大海 看到未来

爽要呐喊 不爽更要喊
压力要甩 忧郁要推翻
爽要呐喊 用力的呐喊 喊到流汗
喊到没遗憾 一生能有几次 跟世界宣战

不想再当模范 不想要再当乖乖牌
我只要摇摆 我只想旋转 我只想阂到腿软
让冬天被打败 让春天冲上了舞台
让热血变红 让天空变蓝 让我把无聊炸开

看羚羊草枝摆 我爱上大自然
来不及等泪乾 来不及防晒
浪漫只怕太慢 痛快只怕太快
快让我看到沙滩 看到大海 看到未来

爽要呐喊 不爽更要喊 压力要甩 忧郁要推翻
爽要呐喊 用力的呐喊 喊到流汗 喊到没遗憾
一生能有几次 跟世界宣战

一生能有几次 终于没人管
一生能有几次 跟世界宣战


heh, say the bolded words ten times in quick succession.

reuben
@ 12:09 AM.

I just wanna be alone tonight
I just wanna take a little breather
Cause lately all we do is fight
And every time it cuts me deeper

Cause something’s changed
You’ve been acting so strange
And its taking its toll on me
Its safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine
Without you

Called you up cause’ it’s been long enough
And you said that you were so much better
We have done a lot of growing up
We were never meant to be together

Cause something changed, you were acting so strange
And it’s taken its toll on me
It’s safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine
Without you

Cause something changed, you were acting so strange
And it’s taken its toll on me
It’s safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine,
Without you
Without you
Without you
Without you
I just wanna be alone tonight,
I just wanna take a little breather.

reuben
@ 11:47 AM.

这感觉已经不对我努力在挽回

reuben
@ 8:59 AM.

墙角迎风的雏菊 茉莉花开的香气
闭上眼回到过去 划分界限的座椅
下课就靠在一起 我就是离不开你
一路争吵的话题 我们说好走到底
因为从此就分离
用黑板上的日期 倒数找你
慢慢清醒
原来思念你是加了糖的消息
我用铅笔
画得更仔细素描那年天气
想你的香气 我想遇见你
那童年的希望是一台时光机
我可以一路开心到底都不换季
带竹蜻蜓 穿过那森林
打开了任意门找到你一起旅行
那童年的希望是一台时光机
给我放罐罐的糖糖你味道熟悉
所有回忆 在夏天的口袋里
一起荡秋千的梦境
在风中找寻着甜蜜
曲周杰伦歌词提供再兴
童年的回忆永远是最好的时光机..
有些话从来不急
一直都放在心底
想要叫你看仔细
而单纯世故的你 已经离去
哦 慢慢清醒
原来思念你是加了糖的消息
我用铅笔
画得更仔细素描那年天气
想你的香气 我想遇见你
那童年的希望是一台时光机
我可以一路开心到底都不换季
带竹蜻蜓 穿过那森林
打开了任意门找到你一起旅行
那童年的希望是一台时光机
给我放罐罐的糖糖你味道熟悉
所有回忆 在夏天的口袋里
一起荡秋千的梦境
在风中找寻着甜蜜

那童年的希望是一台时光机
我可以一路开心到底都不换季
带竹蜻蜓 穿过那森林
打开了任意门找到你一起旅行
那童年的希望是一台时光机
给我放罐罐的糖糖你味道熟悉
所有回忆 在夏天的口袋里
一起荡秋千的梦境
在风中找寻着甜蜜
哦 找寻着甜蜜
哦 找寻着甜蜜
哦 找寻着甜蜜..


我也在寻找一个时光机，带我回到过去……

reuben
@ 12:08 AM.

just renewed my broadband plan.

hopefully i'll be able to sell off the eee pc for like 500+ bucks and i can upgrade my main com somewhat. been weighing the options actually. but i'd rather have something speedy to use at home for the next few years, so yeah.

just watched federer fighting murray in the tennis masters cup. okay, not 'just', it happened like almost three hours ago. a pity that federer lost after fighting off 7 match points. real close match, especially with ten deuces. and i swear i have never ever seen federer executing a dropshot before until today. and he did it like seven times. i think this match was more exciting than the wimbledon final this year.

played tennis today anyway, from 11 to 1. i guess at the end of it we were kinda pissed with the ssc and their way of getting you to pay up. but shan't concentrate on that.

good thing was, i could finally feel something in my serve. but the bad, i didn't manage to win a service game at all, or even a set. and my footwork is as bad as ever. oh well.

but i guess, with every leisure sport, as long as you enjoy it, the results are secondary.

I have to decide,
Was I gonna to play it safe.
Or look somewhere deep in side,
Try to turn the tide,
And find the strength to take that step of faith.


well, i wonder why people listen to emo music. sure, maybe you get to feel that the singer is connecting with your current feelings, but it doesn't raise your spirits up at the end of it. so why not, listen to more upbeat, optimistic music?

maybe this is one reason i refrain from hearing 说好的幸福呢 too often.

it's 1.50am now and i'm not really sleepy yet. maybe cos i slept from like 2-6 today. catching up on all the sleep i've missed over the past few weeks, or maybe a year.

it's good to let your batteries recharge fully every once in a while.

but i've realised that my battery's capacity has decreased over the past year, or that it's taking longer to charge up. because i've never slept so much in my entire life before. in the past, just 7 to 8 hours could keep me going the whole day. but now, i can't resist taking naps on buses. and of course, in lectures and gp too. in fact it would be strange if i weren't to sleep on bus rides lasting more than ten minutes nowadays. and i get more tired easily, somehow. even playing tennis is starting to be a chore. i don't think i can spend three hours playing basketball as i did in the past anymore.

today feels more like a saturday rather than a friday night. well, technically, you can say it's a saturday morning.

okay i don't know why i just brought that point out.

i'm practically talking to myself now. it's the middle of the night, and almost everyone is asleep. there's really no one to talk to at this hour, those people on msn are either a) people i don't (really) know; b) people who leave their coms overnight; c) people who you can't really strike up a convo with or d) people addicted to gaming. hahah. so that leaves me with no one to talk to. except on this blog. except to myself.

i must admit that i am sort of a loner, in the sense that i prefer to be alone sometimes. i need a comfort zone. i hate it when i am forced to converse when i dont' feel like it. i hate it when i have to hang out with dozens of people i don't know.

but then on the flip side, i want to have many many friends. i like hanging around fun-loving ppl, doing all kinds of things. i hate it when people don't reply me. i like crowded places sometimes, cos you don't get noticed.

so i guess, there's some sort of conflict here huh. friends. actually i can't say that i don't have many, in the general sense, i have almost a thousand contacts on msn. but truth is, few, or maybe, none of them are close. sad to say, i don't have anyone i can pour out all my troubles to. or at least i don't feel like doing so. most of the time, no one is willing to do so.

but i actually can understand why this is so. i mean, we all have our troubles and worries too right. if you add it on to someone else, wouldn't it increase the burden on the listener? so i guess, over time, i have stopped confiding in others for this reason. because i realise no one genuinely cares. suree they may open an ear or two, but they aren't genuinely concerned. maybe that's why blogs are created. so that you can rant your ass off. but even then they aren't that private anymore (that's why i use blogger's password protection). but then again, if i could find someone who genuinely cares, why not.

and talking about friends again. i wonder how many of those are genuine friends, and how many are hi-bye kinda friends. or friends who only come to you when they need help and go away when they don't. i've had my fair share of the latter two kind of people, i guess, but not so much the former.

but then again, many things are karma. i must admit i'm not really that of a genuine friend anyway, at least to most people. i don't know how to reciprocate sometimes. and talking about hating people who dao me (e.g. dont reply sms, msn, etc.), i can't complain about that, since i do that too.

boy, i must have lots of issues to be blogging all this rubbish at 2.20am in the morning. let's end this post with a song i'm listening to now.

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?















i've been finding something for the past year, but all efforts to find it have come to naught. will i ever find it?

reuben
@ 2:02 AM.

been trying to tweak vista the past few days but gaming's still a whore.


so i guess off it goes tomorrow morning.

it's back to xp once again.

reuben
@ 12:10 AM.

somehow things feel like deja vu all over again.

rewind six months, and it's a place i wouldn't want to be.

reuben
@ 8:32 AM.

s48 class barbeque on tuesday.

it was quite a success i guess, 'cos almost everyone turned up for the event, which was rather surprising too.

but in the process we had to deal with charcoal that couldn't burn (see la, cheapskate until like tt). but abel had to save the day by buying CHARCOAL KING.

of cos no bbq would be complete w/o dunking ppl. cheeyong was first to go in. i was the catalyst. oops. then abel was next, cos he lost indian poker five times. and cy went down again. LOL.

and i think it's my karma for pushing ppl down on tuesday, that i was completely drenched in the rain while running to school from bus stop for training.




as i speak, i'm installing vista on my main com, as part of my reformat. but somehow sp1 takes like 2x longer to install than the base OS itself.

strange huh.

oh well i wanna play some new games!!!!

reuben
@ 11:00 AM.

11.11.

pw's over. but tbh, i don't miss it one bit. maybe months down the road when i realise i'm the only one not getting an A i'll change my opinion.


last fri was emo day. well there was no cca (at least i was not informed), so i decided to go cycling. that's cos everyone else is busy, busy, busy.


i've always wanted to cycle to the punggol area. cos it's near my house, yet i have never been there before. and i wanted to know where that canal outside hougang mall leads to.

but in the end, i didn't really end up at punggol. but rather, some ulu part of upper serangoon rd.




well, apart from the hdb flats you could see in the distance, it doesn't really feel like singapore at all.




























sungei serangoon really looks cool. if i'm not wrong part of it will flow through punggol21+.

it's really cool to take snapshots of where you're going esp. when biking alone. maybe i should get one of those yahoo geo-tagging bikes where the built-in camera takes a photo every minute and uploads them to flickr.

besides gyming, cycling is one thing that's cool to do alone. actually, sometimes, biking may be more enjoyable when done alone. because you don't have to stop for others, or catch up with the rest. own time, own target, own destination. but sometimes it wouldn't hurt to have a companion too.







stayed over at zm's house on sat nite. my pete sampras and michael chang made amazing comebacks from 6-0 down in the first set and almost won the second and third sets. but they still didn't win, aw.


cluedo seems to have lost its lustre already. maybe cos we're alr playing mind games every day. so, we played risk.

which was also a mind game coz we kept psychoing zh to join forces with us against zm.

to put it nicely, i was left with middle east at the end, but my lone valiant middle east freedom fighter failed to be exterminated. to put it crudely, my land was just so unimportant that no one bothered to fight it. lol, but even if they fight me they'll face stiff resistance, coz of my control of the taliban in afghanistan!!

ok before the fbi or whoever arrests me, it's just the game called RISK.



class bbq this evening. hope things turn out well.

reuben
@ 9:48 AM.

abs hurt like f**k, no thanks to monday.

no trg ytd, which you could say it was a rather rare occurrence. but then, everyone else's busy, so what's the difference. in the end played some bball at the court behind bishan cc. maybe it's just me but i feel that im jumping a little higher now.

so obama has won. one thing i don't get, why are there victory parties all over the world. it's not like we're electing the world president. i must say i admire mccain's tenacity. so many times he was written off, but he came through until the very end. well, maybe obama too, who was an unlikely candidate in the first place.

but that goes to show impossible is nothing, despite the odds that stack.

i'm hoping for some positive changes too, in my life.



I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

reuben
@ 1:58 PM.

stuff i found while packing






it's been one full year already.


but well, i'm glad i tidied up my room somewhat. finally removed that spoilt speaker from my desk, as well as the joystick that i almost never use. and my router and modem ain't in danger of toppling over anytime finally.

bottom of my desk is much much cleaned up too. and my study cupboard is much more organised as well.

there's still a fair amount of stuff left to sort out, but i guess i'll leave it to another time.


life's been okay lately i guess. just that freaking op won't be over for me until next monday. which sucks ttm. sucks to see everyone around you enjoying while you still have op. grr.

finalised the slides yesterday though. but i've yet to memorised my script fully. and the clock is ticking.


hope i can go m'sia next week? or should i?

reuben
@ 11:53 AM.

did some packing today.

my whole room was in a mess, and i think it looks worst now. but nvm, once everything is cleared up and arranged into its positions, then i guess it'll look neat. maybe only for a week or so.


and through the process memories were evoked. somehow there were stuff dating back to sec1, which i finally threw away. and of course, stuff i wrote during revision for Os. oh and i still remember tearing my history notes one year ago after the paper.

well many things happened lately, will elaborate another time. for now, it's off to cca.


oh and before i forget, i justt came up with this phrase while packing. hahahah. no i am not falling in love or anything.

but love is like an investment, you either reap its dividends or you end up with a lehman minibond. hohoho.

reuben
@ 1:48 PM.